So here we are again, Valentine’s Day, the day that florists and Hallmark love even more than Saint Valentine himself.
St. Valentine, there were about six Valentines by the way, is the official saint of beekeepers and epilepsy. Not sounding too romantic now, is he? I might add he also was beheaded. He was a martyr, he died for his Catholic beliefs.
The old saying, “the birds and the bees,” may even be connected to Valentine’s day. The holiday itself did not exist until Chaucer’s Parliament of Fowles, where he mentions, “For this was sent on Seynt Valentyne’s day, Whan every foul cometh ther to choose his mate.” Patron Saint of beekeepers, foul choosing mates- birds and bees-get it? Yeah, I know, it is a bit of a stretch.
Even the police in Ireland, the Gardai Siochana, find the time to share the love despite the problems caused by storm Darwin.
And in case you are married to an Irish woman, IrishCentral.com has compiled a list of things Irish women say, and translates their real meaning.
PulpIntereast suggests 10 alternative romantic movies for Valentine’s Day, right here.
Google has a strange, slightly stupid header today. Sorry, but this whole notion of someone having a “cute sneeze” is a bit too much. Or maybe I am just jealous, my sneezes could peel wallpaper and water the house plants.
So here is my message for Valentine’s Day:
Roses are red, violets are blue, you think I’m lovely, but I’m really a shrew.
Oh my seasonal allergies! These carnations are cheap, I now need my inhaler, you bleeping bleep bleep.
I’ve packed all your things, you can take the flowers with you, you knew well I had asthma, you giant big $h!t you!
Happy Valentine’s Day!